CanExplores

Family trips can be concerning and cathartic or devastating and a disaster.
This trip was a little of both. For most of my adult life, the family I had gotten away from was back in my life. They were distant but open to my grandson and me. Learning to navigate this type of situation is a challenge and rewarding. You have a few moments where you can see through the other person’s eyes, understand family dynamics, and contemplate your past or childhood. You hear stories that your parents did not tell, and if they did, it was only a portion of the story. You also find out things you knew but were never discussed.

On this trip, I was able to see from my son’s perspective, I learned some truths regarding my parents, and I understood an aunt’s grief I never knew she had. I introduced my grandson to people and a place he would not have had the opportunity to meet before. He made friends and relationships he did not have at home. He also had the chance to see a different kind of life- one in the south, a little more conservative, laid back, and almost judgmental. He was introduced to a few friends who did not know of his sensory processing and just accepted him, he became frustrated at one point, but it was a win-win as I saw it. No meltdown, no destruction, and no tantrum. So, all in all, a good confrontation and new growth.

Christian learned some history of our nation and the undercurrent of the black-white conflict. He saw an actual plantation, learned about slavery up close (as much as possible in this time and day), and began to understand the issues that went way back- before Martin Luther King Jr or Ferguson Saint Louis. He saw pictures of young boys working the fields and heard stories of families separated and the living conditions they had to survive. When we finished our trip to Booker T Washington’s birth home, he was tired. He had some questions but was quiet and thoughtful. Once we are home, we borrow a book from the library to review his life and successes. We will probably wait to publish our video on his birth home until Black History month as a celebration of a man.

We also visited the D Day National Memorial on our vacation. It was fantastic and beautifully done. Honor the men who died on that day is something we may publish on Armed Forces Day. As a military family member that goes way back to the American Revolution, it is not surprising when my grandson becomes fascinated with the exhibits and memorials depicting war or soldiers. He was in awe at the sculptures and facts regarding D-day. He intended to let all his viewers on Facebook know about the memorial. He was mesmerized by the docents who spoke in the different areas. He devoted his prayer to the families of the deceased.
We continued our discovery of the area and history, which is our country’s foundation.

While on the exploration, we visited Thomas Jefferson’s retreat home. We expected to see something a little different and would have enjoyed looking a the furniture and furnishings he may have used. The focus here was the structure and architecture used by Jefferson.

Rebuilding the house to its original state and only pictures of most of the furnishings and a few samples for tourists to admire were different from what we are used to but still very interesting. Some parts of the house were not completed and replicated as Jefferson had it in his time due to changes in his design as he worked on it. We enjoyed the building and the time in the gardens. Christian enjoys looking at rocks, buildings, and woodworking, so it was not a disappointment. I did accidentally delete the pictures and needed to try to retrieve them.

One thought that continues to nag at me is the temperature of our nation. We as a nation are destroying our foundations and the structures of remembrance that made this country. I am not condoning slavery, and I would never say we needed to be enslaved people as I am against the idea. However, visiting Jefferson’s home and knowing he enslaved people makes me wonder if anyone will enjoy the architecture of the house and its building in that time as impressive as we thought it was or if they would only see he was a slave owner? Christian and I always discuss slavery and how indentured servants were also allowed, which is wrong; I explained how slavery started and how it was cruel and horrible for families. We also discussed the abuse related to slavery.

We also discussed how destroying our country’s heritage is wrong. If we eliminate what makes us mad or what we feel is injustice, it will allow others to act in violence toward injustice. It will also have us forget unfairness or prejudice. As a human, we never want to forget WWII and the Holocaust. Once we minimize or ignore what happened, we allow others to act inhumanly toward one sect of people because of race, color, or religion. This action is unacceptable.

While helping children learn to understand their heritage and limitations, it seems essential to help them know what others have had to overcome. Surprisingly, we do not allow our children to appreciate their uniqueness and be ok with it. Each person has something unique, an individual strength or weakness, which gives them the ability to be different. Being different is not bad; it is just different, unique, and maybe a bit odd. It gives us something to overcome, which strengthens us- like the caterpillar who turns into the butterfly. If we help the butterfly out of the cocoon, it will die. Denying our children can paralyze them; we can hinder their real growth, limit their creativity, and delay knowledge.

This vacation was a little different and full of family secrets, life lessons, and history wrapped up in fun! What do children need to know about their heritage? That is a question for each parent to decide; however, we are teaching them while thinking about the life lessons. What do we want our children to carry on to the next generation? What do we need them to remember so they can change?

Virginia is full of history and beautiful scenery; deciding where to go was finding what was open? With Covid-19, it is more social distancing and having fun while doing it. Our trip was a week, and it could have been longer to get all the sights in. Next time we need to run over to Washington DC, up to Philly and Lancaster, and on to the beach. Most of this area is our history of Americans. It is our heritage as United States citizens. All families have some good, bad, and ugly in their history, and the United States is no different. We can’t take the nasty out and shield our children from it. We need to let them see what is real, how people lived, and what they did to decide how they want to move forward in the future. Knowledge is power, and it is our responsibility to train and empower our children to make positive and healthy choices for all people.